Wednesday, November 29, 2006,11:18 PM
Any Trivia fans out there??

I just found this site called blufr. It's basically an online trivia site. It's really fun and the questions are really new and original.... I was really pleasantly surprised!
The cool thing is, you can add these little trivia questions to your website, to your blog, to email signatures... anywhere really!

So, what am I gonna do...??? Post a question here for you to answer!
Try it out, it's really fun!!!




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free online dictionary and more



Go ahead.... check it out and entertain your friends!!!
 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 0 comments
Tuesday, November 28, 2006,11:53 PM
Blog pimpin....and other stuff
I have been going through my Blog list these past two days. What's my blog list?
It's all those blogs I have saved in a folder with all my other bookmarks. Some I t read on a regular basis... others I even forget I have bookmarked, but all are worth checking out!
Now, since I recently discovered an awsome AWSOME feature on skype... (what is Skype? OMG, you still haven't got it yet???) I have been going through my favourite RSS feeds and adding each one to this new "contact" which I recently added to my skype contact

Ok, let me side-track one sec... this was supposed to be a brief post, just listing some cool blogs to check out, but as I wrote the short paragraph above, I just realised I mentioned a few terms some of you might not be familiar with.
Let's proceed in order:
  • Skype - Skype is a free program that uses the latest P2P (cutting edge p2p technology) technology to bring affordable and high-quality voice communications to people all over the world. When you use the free Skype software, you can connect to other Skype users so that you can talk and chat. You can voice chat, with headset, microhpone and headphones or you can use a skype VOIP phone.
    Skype is built from the ground up for voice communications across platforms and around the world. You can also use Skype to make calls to any regular telephone number all over the world at very low prices. Skype allows you to easily talk for free to anyone else using Skype whether they are on Mac, Linux, Windows or Pocket PC.
    Also, from Skype 2.0 for Mac and above you can make video conference calls with other Skype users and even if the person you are calling doesn’t have a webcam, you can still hold one way video calls.
    Beyond all this, you can use skype like any other IM programe and tect chat, send files, and videoconference.
    Why is Skype better than Net2Phone, ICQ, AIM, MSN/Windows Live Messenger etc? Because it works! Most voice applications don't work well from behind firewalls and NAT (Network Address Translation) devices, and nearly all broadband users are behind a NAT or a firewall. Skype’s advanced design let's you call the whole world from nearly all kinds of network configurations without having to compromise your security!
    High Call Completion Rate -
    No other application that allows you to make calls over the Internet has a completion rate as high as that of Skype.
    Superior Sound Quality - Current voice and chat applications just don't measure up. Skype uses proprietary technology and has collaborated with the best acoustic scientists in the business to deliver sound quality even superior to that of your fixed telephone line!
    Extremely Easy to Use - Current voice applications are difficult to configure and it seems like the provider assumes all its users are experts in engineering. With Skype, there is no difficult hardware or software configuration. You won’t have to work to use Skype; Skype will work for you!
    Totally Secure Communications - Your calls are encrypted and are totally secure.
    What are you waiting for, go download it NOW!
    (Source - skype.com)

  • RSS Feeds - or web feed is a data format used for serving users frequently updated content. Content distributors syndicate a web feed, thereby allowing users to subscribe to it. Making a collection of web feeds accessible in one spot is known as aggregation.
    In the typical scenario of using web feeds, a content provider publishes a feed link on their site which end users can register with an aggregator program (also called a feed reader or a news reader) running on their own machines; doing this is usually as simple as dragging the link from the web browser to the aggregator. When instructed, the aggregator asks all the servers in its feed list if they have new content; if so, the aggregator either makes a note of the new content or downloads it. Aggregators can be scheduled to check for new content periodically.
    The kinds of content delivered by a web feed are typically HTML (webpage content) or links to webpages and other kinds of digital media. Often when websites provide web feeds to notify users of content updates, they only include summaries in the web feed rather than the full content itself. Web feeds are operated by many news web sites, weblogs, schools, and podcasters.
    The initials "RSS" are variously used to refer to the following standards:
    Really Simple Syndication (RSS 2.0)
    Rich Site Summary (RSS 0.91, RSS 1.0)
    RDF
    Site Summary (RSS 0.9 and 1.0)
    RSS delivers its information as an XML file called an "RSS feed", "webfeed", "RSS stream", or "RSS channel". Programs known as feed readersor aggregators can check a list of feeds on behalf of a user and display any updated articles that they find. It is common to find web feeds on major websites and many smaller ones, such as on this very own blog.
    Basically, if you want to stay up to date with a certain site, or have on the minute delivery of each new post, then this technology is very very useful. It's your very own personalised "door-to-door" content delivery!
    (source - Wikipedia.com)

Now to get back to my post, when I mentoined the "contact" I just added to my skype buddy list, I was refferring to a website called Anothr which has created a Skype RSS robot. What this means is that if you add them to your skype buddy list, they will provide real-time alerts for your favorite feeds, just like any other feed reader. It's really simple and workes perfectly.
I have now started adding all my favourite blog feeds to it and as each blog is updated, I get a message in real time, from the Anothr robot, telling me the blog has been updated. It gives me the title to the post and a few lines from it.... now I will never loose track of any post again!

----------------------------------

OK... and here's my recommendation list! (These are all blogs)




That's all folks!!



 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 3 comments
Monday, November 27, 2006,12:03 AM
Reflections on what was
Today was my ex's birthday. I hadn't thought about it all day and then before going out tonight I remembered and sent him a text message to wish him happy birthday.

The story of my ex and I is a long one. Not because of its up and downs, not because it was complicated and drawn out. I call it that, simply because it was a long relationship. We were together for 6 and a half years. It wasn't my first love but it was my first long, serious relationship.
Our parents knew each other, we are of the same religious faith and we thought we'd end up together for the rest of our lives.

I don't think back to that time of my life with regret or with nostalgia. It was an important time of my life. I have a lot to be thankful for. Those years with him formed me, we grew up together. I am the woman I am today also because of him, and I think the same can safely be said for him.

We barely knew each other when we started dating. I was only 21, he was 23. We were in our first years of college. We were young and life was still a game. Though different, we were attracted to one another. We had nothing in common, yet him being so different from me attracted me. In time, of course, our attraction matured and developed into something else. We became very close to one another. I was living away from home and in his family I found a second home.
We continued to see each other and spend all the holidays together. We were working hard to finish school and we were becoming young adults. I was finding myself interested in certain things, while he was interested in others. While he was growing more and more attatched to his religion, I was enjoying my social life.
Inevitably we started drifting. Our love, in time, started to fade and often we butted heads on anything and everything. We had started to fall apart. Towards the last year of our relationship, being together just seemed to be an automatism... it seemed like one of those automatic mechanisms you have or do without even thinking, like brushing your teeth or breathing.
Somewhere within those almost seven years we had lost one another. We had lost the meaning of our relationship or what being together was all about, and whatever we first saw in one another seemed long gone.
I am able to say this now, reflecting on it, but when I was actually living this, it never hit me. Sometimes I felt like I was someone else looking in. If I stood back and took a glimpse at my life from the outside... deep down inside I knew that things were different, that we didn't love each other anymore. It was, however, a deep hidden feeling, almost sub-conscious. If it had been so obvious I would have taken steps to maybe end the relationship, or at least confront D. with these issues. But for some reason I never spoke about it. I never mentioned it... never willingly admitted it, not even to myself.

I have no regrets or remorse on how our relationship ended. We didn't have a big fight, or say mean things to one another. We simply just one day confronted each other and said that things couldn't go on with the way they were. In all honesty, it was D. who came to me. He told that our difference in opinions on how to live our lives, from a religious point of view, couldn't possibly be promising for a future together. I was faced with a choice... change and adapt to his way of life or.....
Or???? At first this hit me hard. I was devastated. How could I give up my beliefs for someone? How could I live my lfe pretending to be something I wasn't? Mostly, why was I faced with the choice?
We took a breather. We decided to think things through. I cried. I talked it out with my parents, with my best friend and suddenly it hit me. This is who I am now. I can never be what I'm not. I can't change and give up what I believe in, or adopt beliefs which aren't mine. But mostly, I want to think about me, about my life. Me me me.... no where in my thoughts was there ever the notion of losing him. It was clear. "It" was gone. The love that we'd shared for so long, somewhere somehow, had ended.
In those 20 some days apart, I had made my choice. By the end of the first week I knew that our relationship had been over for almost a year now. The hard part was finding a way to tell him.
I wasn't sure what to expect. I had no idea if he felt the same, if he'd be glad to see this end too or if he'd be hurt. I didn't know how he felt about me. We had grown so apart I no longer knew who I was getting ready to confront.

It was a very hard, trying time. Never have I felt so alone. Not alone in it's usual sense, but alone in the sense that, I realised that in the last few months I had been with someone, a partner, but I felt like I was sitting next to a stranger. I didn't recognise him anymore. Wehen I told him how I felt, and that I was ready to end it all and walk on without him, he told me that he too felt the same and had felt this way for some time now. How could we just not have noticed? We had been looking the other way for months. What were we so busy doing to not notice that somewhere we had lost one another?

I don't know why I am sitting here telling you all this. It's not like I look back with sadness. I have never been happier. It was the best decision I have ever made. Sometimes things just come to an end and then you move on. For some reason though, tonight, as I remembered his birthday, for one instant it was as if I was looking back in time and seeing what my life used to be.
I don't miss him, nor what my life was like back then. I am glad to have lived those moments, shared my past with someone. If I had to go back, I'd do it all again. I can however say that sometimes remembering a time so far away makes you nostalgic. Not neccessarily nostagic for the times itself, but I guess thinking that so much has changed in so many years just can't help to make you think about it. It makes you realsie that life has gone forward. Whether we want to or not, times passes.

I see myself now, such a different person, yet still the same. My life now is completely different. I am engaged and hoping to get married by the summer. I am with a man that in some respects is completely opposite to D. I have moved forward, grown up so much. I don't miss anything from my past. For so many reasons I am thankful for what I experienced back then. I now know what I want in life and what I seek in a partner also because of what life and what being with D. taught me.
They say you learn from your mistakes. I don't concider D. a mistake. It was great while it lasted. He was my first love and as such will always stay in my heart. However, I now know that I can look forward and only wish that what I have with Michael today will always stay special and never ever be taken for granted. I want to marry him and share our life together, our dreams and always have him by my side, no matter where our lifes takes us. No matter where the road leads us, I pray we'll always be together, happy, respectful of one another and thankful that we found each other.

As for D... to him tonight I dedicate my post. I was sad to see our friendship end. We rarely see each other these days. It hurt me to realise that we'd never be able to friends. We shared so much, seeing him just vanish from my life was a shame. Not my choice, but for some reason his life has changed completely since we broke up. He's changed crowds. He no longer comes out with us anymore. His path has led him further away. I can't blame him for it. We each have to follow our own paths. I did however manage to see him in october. We had a long talk, shared our lives for a few minutes. We talked about what we were up to, what we did over the summer. I finally was able to see him for who he has become today. He is independant, happy; a grown man. He has several times said, but mostly implied, that he also owes this partly to me. It feels good to know that even though you're no longer together, somehow you've made an impact or left a mark. How horrific otherwise, if after six and a half years, all that's left is nothing.
If the woman I am today is partially due to D. and to being with him I know that life's experience are worthwhile, even when they end.

We broke up over two and a half years ago... finally we have come to understand that we will always be a part of each other's identities. It's only inevitable that a person who has meant so much to you for so long will always hold a place in your heart. Don't get me wrong, I care for him as a friend, almost as a brother. This may seem strange, but I say this with the best intentions.
We have accepted this and moved on. He is in my past. Though I don't think of him anymore, if not perhaps once or twice a year, he will never be forgotten. I think back with a smile. I'm glad to be able to say that. Not everyone is so fortunate to look back on their past with a smile.

Now, I wait for the future to unfold before me. I'll marry Michael. He is my future.
I'm waiting patiently. It's hard. Patience sees to be wearing thin these days. Nonetheless, I'm waiting. I welcome it.
When the time is right, when it's in the cards, I'll be here.... with arms wide open.




 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 1 comments
Tuesday, November 21, 2006,5:44 PM
Holy crap, Batman!
I cut off all my locks today!!! Dig the new look??












 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 2 comments
Monday, November 20, 2006,4:06 PM
Yay me!


I don't have to go in to work today!!!!



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posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 2 comments
,1:44 AM
Somewhere Only We Know - Keane

I walked across an empty land
I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
I felt the earth beneath my feet
Sat by the river and it made me complete
Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches of it looking at me
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?

Oh simple thing where have you gone
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin

And if you have a minute why don't we go
Talk about it somewhere only we know?
This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?

This could be the end of everything
So why don't we go
Somewhere only we know?



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posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 0 comments
,12:55 AM
End of weekend ponderations
I got home last night after work feeling like I was 104 years old! I really can't take standing up for so many hours in a row anymore.... talk about getting old or what! No laughing... I am really starting to feel the ageing process!! Shit, this is sad!
I was looking forward to going out last night, meeting up with some friends, but I just couldn't deal with getting up off of the couch after dinner!

I've started seeing more and more of Claudia, an old friend from middle school and her friend Giulia. They're always so available and willing to go out... never have any hang-ups or whatnot. They're closer to me than my best friends are, or that's how it seems to be lately.
So today I met up with them again. We went out for lunch with some of their other friends too.
I'm pretty happy, I'm getting to know a whole bunch of new people, and this is really good for me. It's almost therapeutic. I know this can sound dumb, but sometimes you just feel the need to make a change ya know? Even if in the slightest. I was pretty depressed last week and I've noticed how my mood has just been terrible. I needed something to take my mind off things.

Lately I only get to see my usual crowd of friends occasionally, for some weird reason. They are all paired up in couples, most have started living together so often they do things on their own or maybe go out to dinner just 2 couples or so. Plus, everyone works and I don't so I guess they don't go out as often. Claudia and Giulia, on the other hand, are in my same position. They are both unemployed right now, so they have more free time on their hands. But it's not just that. We have the same interests, we all three took the same courses in college and are all lively and sociable and nutty! I miss nutty, darn it!!! It feels good to act all crazy and silly and girly sometimes! Even if you are 30!!! Lately I was starting to feel like I was already retired or something but hadn't lived my life yet! Milena, my best friend is just totally different from the way she was before. We just have different interests now. Sometimes I even wonder how we became best friends! Her boyfriend is just too quiet for me... they never want to do anything besides go to the movies or go for walks. I mean, that's cool.. I love the movies and going to the park or dowtown but not if that's all you ever only do, every single week-end.
Never a bar or a pub... god forbid I should ever mention going to a club!! Somtimes I think she went straight from 27 to 55 all in one go!

As for Francesca, well she's always been a bit quieter, but still fun to hang with. Strangely, though, she's been single since forever! Thing is, she's really pretty too!!
This summer though she lost her father very VERY unexpectedly. She was very close to him and of course this tragic event has devastated her. Not only is she having a hard time herself, but she also feels responsible of taking care of her mother who if course is always alone during the day and is now afraid of being alone in the evenings.
She does also live with an older sister, but she has a boyfriend so I guess has other things to occupy her mind... she's often out for the week end. Also, her personality is very different to Francesca's. She's stronger and I guess faces adversities in a different way.
I feel bad for her because as much as you try and say something, be there for her, show her somehow that you care and are thinking of her, there is just nothing you can really do. This is just something that will have to be dealt with and maybe only time will help ease.
I know you never recover from something like this... I guess eventually, in time, living your days and weeks just becomes a bit easier.
For now, she doesn't want to go out at all, more than she neccessarily has to, for work and choir. Thank god she has choir twice a week to keep her busy. It's something her and Milena have been doing for 2 years now and they are very dedicated.
Of course Milena and I don't push Francesca at all to go out. We try to invite her to places and when she refuses we are ok with it... but how long is it ok for this to go on, before it starts getting worrying? It's barely been 4 months since her father's passing, but I can't help but be concerned for her. She's only 31, she can't waste the best years of her life this way, she'll end up isolated and alone. It's just heartbreaking! It saddens me so much to have to sit and watch helpless.
I only hope that she'll soon find new hope and the will to get on with her life.

I'm back to work tomorrow. (I know I earlier implied I was unemployed, but seeing as this is bullshit work, I don't concider it a job. I concider this crap.)
The job is fun, my boss is not. She's actually quite a bitch. The worst part of it all is that I am way better than this. As much as I am glad I'm earning a few eurobucks, I am highly highly mortified of having yet to swallow my pride and bow down to such petty bullshit. I don't want to come off as an elitist. I'm not like that.. it's just that after having studied 10 years, slaved over my master's, worked all throughout my college to help pay for living expenses, and done almost every job under the sun, hearing some snotty-nosed 50 year old bitch treat you like dirt, when she can't even spit out a gramatically correct sentence, cussing every 10 seconds and treating you like you're dumber & dumber .... well that, that just pisses me off. I am mad at myself for having to yet again take this bullshit just to be able to live.
I am done with being shitted on... when is it my turn to turn my shit into shinola?

Ok... I'm an elitist, now sue me for all my sushi!




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posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 3 comments
Wednesday, November 15, 2006,8:24 PM
A new day - japanese cat luck needed!
I have to say I'm feeling a lot better.
I've started using the gym as my stress-relief tool. I talked things over with Michael... cried on his shoulder some and got things off my chest.
I've decided to be a bit more active and though I didn't want to find some crummy old job at first, I sure welcome the extra money, plus it gets me out of the house, which is always good.
Today was my first day. I'm now working at Daruma Sushi, a Sushi takeaway deli. I have to say the place is really cool. I've always had a bit of a soft spot for all those japanese artifacts, tea sets and cute objects. The funny thing is, though, I've never tried sushi in my life! I have to admit, Iì'm not fond of fish at all, infact you could easily say I hate it. People have told me thought that Sushi is quite different and the taste of the raw fish isn't as strong. I have yet to confirm or bust this myth... we shall see!!

I'm doing a part-time for now, as I'm still hoping to find that "real" job I'm seeking in PR/marketing/communications. We shall see...
Meantime I've also applied for an internship at a web design agency, as a graphic design junior. I've always had a passion for graphic design and would love ht eopportunity to lean more, and seeing as they're seeking an intern who can "learn by doing" (as they so clearly stated in their job desription) I figured I might just stand a chance.
Today I went to the interview. We talked a bit, but of course they still have to interview a few other candidates. I'll be honest with you... I'm really hoping of getting this job. I think it would be fun and give me a chance to pick up lots of new tricks of the trade and learn cool new things. We shall see.... I'm trying to be hopeful here and less pessimistic. Only time will tell if I'll be proved wrong once again!
 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 3 comments
Friday, November 10, 2006,2:40 PM
Here comes the low
Do you ever feel your life goes in cycles? Maybe not in cycles... but in waves of highs and lows??
Well, lately I've just been feeling really wound up tight. I don't know exactly what has gotten in to me, but the lows are definately here!!
I feel like I'm really wound up... I feel as tense and as taught as wire and my patience is really starting to wear thin.
I don't know why I'm in such a foul, pissy mood, but I guess I'm just not happy. If I sit and analyse my life right now I can narrow it down to a few single things, which I guess, if you add them all up can be held accountable for my "wonderful" mood!

I went for that interview last week, that I was really hoping for and even thought the interview itself didn't go badly, I don't think they'll be hiring me for the position, seeing as they're seeking something else than what I can offer.
Also, I haven't been able to see much of my girlfriends. They're so busy between work and other activities, there isn't much free time left in the week to be able to spend together, so I kind of miss them and kind of feel put aside. They haven't returned my emails and haven't taken much interest in me lately. I know I can get childish like that, but I'm feeling a bit left out of Life right now. My life in incredibly the same day in and day out. Not having a job and things to occupy my day is killing me and of course is adding to my frustration.
I'm starting to loose faith in my talents and in my ability to ever do something important with my life because I can't seem to find work. I'm loosing all hope that I'll ever find a decent job.
I'm currently bored out of my mind, but thank God that at least I've signed up to the gym.
At least I'm getting out there and doing some excercise. It feels good to be active, to work up a sweat and to get the heart racing and blood pumping. It really helps relieve some of the built up tension (luckily tonight I'm going to my 3rd lesson... I really need it!!)

I dunno.... I just feel at the end of my fuse ya know? I'm usually such a happy, positive person but lately I just can't seem to find happiness or hope in anything.
I'm supposed to be engaged and looking forward to my wedding, but the future seems so uncertain, what with this DAMN visa crap... it's like I can never get to the end of the rainbow... it's like it's somewhere out there beyond the horizon and the more I walk towards it, the more I can't get to it.
I miss michael, yet all we seem to do lately is miscommunicate. I dunno, it's probably all my fault, seeing as I'm just so impatient and pissed at the world lately, but I feel angry at him too!

I wish I had something to look forward to, but with not having a job and money being tight... I can't even look forward to planning anything.
Mainly I'm just bored! I am just so done with wasting my talents by laying around doing nothing. I know I have so much to give, so much to contribute... I just want one effin chance to prove it!!
I need to find something to occupy my time, and all those little projects I've been doing and my to-do list are almost all done!!!

Anybody need a logo or website made???
 
posted by sunshinecity ¤ Permalink ¤ 1 comments